I want to make sure this is a perfect investment..means…couldn’t care less where I live just so long as my mates don’t laugh at me.
I need a good sized reception room.. look at me, I’ve got a 54” one
I need a good sized reception room…I’ve got loads of mates and I have big plans for ‘group wii-ing’
I want a vibrant area…that just means pub and take-away.
I want a nice kitchen…girls like them don’t they??
I need some outside space…smokes cigars and ‘stuff’
I want open space nearby…deluding himself that he will take up jogging- with that gut? Ha Ha
I don’t want to park on the road….. thinks his MX5 is a Porsche
I need garaging for the Porsche…yes you’ve told me at least thirty times. A Porsche you say. Wow!
I want wooden floors… no intention of hoovering..ever
I want a large shower…don’t go there!
I would prefer concrete floors… he’s thinking about buying a water bed.
I need to see the loft…bloody hell, he wants a train set.
I want to live in Belsize Park or Hampstead..just got his first BBC comedy commission
I want to live in Chiswick..trying to get his first BBC comedy commission but surviving on stand-up
I want to live in Ealing… stand-up’s not going so well- he can’t afford Chiswick